We all have our share of bad days. Yesterday I had mine and today was supposed to be different. Today I woke up early, rested, & ready to conquer the world. Today I assumed, everything was supposed to go right.
After getting my makeup on at 5:15 in the morning I started breakfast like I’ve done a million times before. There was no reason to expect a problem. But there it was anyway. I had attempted to peel 3 eggs that looked as though a group of rats had gnawed them open instead. I tried to hold it back. I tried to tell myself I’d eventually get it right but they sat there mocking me, shoving the word failure down my throat.
My husband was finally up so I called him over for help. As he sat there patiently watching me peel my 4th egg, I broke down. Somehow I made the egg explode into a million pieces all over the kitchen sink out of sheer frustration. I was about to start crying but instead started laughing at the expression of shock on his face.
I’m embarrassed to tell you I cried. Yeah, I could blame my hormones. I could blame the pregnancy. But I knew that wasn’t the case. So I let it out. I told my husband that I didn’t want to have another bad day and that starting my day failing at peeling eggs wasn’t helping.
He said ” Yeah, this does suck. But just because you’re having a bad moment doesn’t man you’re a failure.” Then he suggested I update my Snapchat about my breakdown. I laughed at the idea of it and said ” What the hell is wrong with you? People are going to laugh because its not a real problem “. Obviously, this put the situation in perspective but I realized that even though it’s not a serious problem, it was still very frustrating. I was minimizing it. This problem almost made me want to give up on hard boiled eggs for the rest of my life.
But what if I had just started my health journey?
“This problem could’ve had the capacity to derail my weight loss goals forever.”
I could’ve said, “Screw this. Let’s go get donuts instead” had that been my go-to emotional comfort zone. I could’ve said ” This is what happens when I try to eat healthy! Clearly, I suck. I’m never going to try again.” Honestly, these thoughts are still there. I just don’t follow through.
Instead I do 4 things that may help you if you ever find yourself in a similar situation:
- Accept that it was just a moment of failure. It’s ok to admit that I made a mistake. In fact, it’s healthy to accept the consequences of my actions. Even if that means it makes me feel like a failure. I should have let the eggs cool instead of running them under water. My husband had told me this several times already. I should’ve listened.
- Learn that moments of failure do not define who you are. Just because I feel like a failure, doesn’t mean I AM ONE. These are two very distinct differences. Making a mistake do not define me. Now if I’m constantly repeating them & NOT learning anything from them, well maybe there’s an entirely different problem altogether.
- Decide that this moment will not define the rest of your day. The last thing I wanted was another bad day, so why on earth would I let it determine the theme of this one? I may not have full control over every situation that happens to me, but at least I know I have control over how I respond.
- Move on. I didn’t linger on it. I didn’t continue to think about it. I didn’t let it defeat me. I didn’t carry the frustration over to my next thing. I simply decided it wasn’t worth my attention anymore. I let it go. Most importantly, I forgave myself for being so hard on myself. Essentially, in the end I gave myself grace.
As a mom, I find that our own expectations of perfection can be our worst enemies towards self-defeat. So I’m going to end with this…
Don’t let your own expectations of perfection get in the way of your overall journey and destination. It’s important to recognize our mistakes a long the way. However, it’s equally important to celebrate the small victories that are getting you closer to where you want, who you want to become, and where you want to be.
The next time I’m able to peel a hard boiled egg I will definitely admire the beauty of it’s perfection, celebrate the victory, & remember the lessons it’s taught me today.