When I was pregnant with Emma one of my best friends kept telling me she’d help me get on a schedule. I had never been on a schedule myself. In fact, the thought of committing to this terrified me. I was the kind of person that would spontaneously climb a mountain one day and go to the beach the next. Did I mention that I loved being busy and always on the go? Saying yes to everything was my favorite, even if that meant that I’d have to break my back. Why the heck would I limit myself to the confines of a schedule? Heck no.
But she invited me over to witness firsthand the beauty of how she managed her day with not one, but three kids! Read that story here.
We started this particular schedule July 1st, but recently dropped the 5 am feeding in the last couple of days. I knew it was time because even though Esben would intitally cry for that feeding he wouldn’t eat anything because he was so sleepy.
Anyways, I’m finally getting to sleep from 11pm-1:30 and then again from 2am-8am. I also get a power nap in from 2:15-3:00 pm. Seriously, I’m beyond thrilled for more sleep. I find that sleep is essential for my energy, sanity, marriage, and the day-to-day grind of being a good mom who aspires to build a business.
Now this isn’t for everyone. I believe it requires a ton of work (initially!), lots of patience, a willingness to be diligent regardless of the critics, and also being a keen student to your babies behaviors, cries, and patterns. This is especially hard for first time moms.
In my humble opinion, it is completely worth it.
My goal is to have several affordable options available for mom’s who need help getting started or tweaking their existing schedule. I’m hopeful that I can have these options available by the end of July. Crossing my fingers.
Oh and before I forget this is the * hands on activity stuff we currently do.
* some type of craft, play-doh, building blocks, puzzles, look & find books, cooking, & preschool stuff.
First of all congratulations on giving birth!
Regardless of how you had your baby, she or he is finally in your arms. As you delight in this little miracle that’s yours to keep I’m guessing you’re also becoming well aware of the pain, confusion, frustration, exhaustion, and shock the postpartum world can bring. Giving birth in any form deserves an applause. You’re a champion whether your pushed that baby with or without drugs. I’ve had both a c-section and a vaginal birth; trust me when I say both have their pros and cons.
A woman’s body is truly an incredible thing. It knows exactly what it needs to do to grow and birth a baby, heal your wounds, and make transition as a new mom easier. It’s pretty amazing how the uterus knows how to shrink back to normal on its own or how the love hormone gets the milk flowing on top of giving us the extra energy for those late night feedings. I know it may not look or feel that way, but it’s important to acknowledge that you didn’t have to tell or prepare your body to do anything. It knew and still knows exactly what to do.
Unfortunately, women don’t talk about these postpartum changes. She doesn’t talk about her birth story, strange body, horrific pain, or mixed emotions. It’s all about the baby now & there are expectations she feels pressured to meet.
She’s not supposed to talk about her fear of going to the restroom for the first time after giving birth. She’s not supposed to complain about the way she looks. In fact, if she says anything about feeling ugly, hopeless, disconnected or depressed she’s told to go see a doctor as if she’s contracted a disease. She’s told to just enjoy being a mom & to worry about her new body later. Meanwhile, she’s terrified at the idea of having sex because her postpartum body is now the primary source of her insecurity. However, she’s told that it all gets easier with time. As if somehow this time factor was supposed to magically give her a sense of relief.
Basically, I believe most postpartum moms are brushed aside & their true feelings, concerns, & frustrations aren’t actually heard or validated.
So, why don’t we talk about our postpartum recovery?
While not every mom can relate to every single thing on this list, sharing my personal struggles has revealed that I’m not alone. When you decide not to talk about your postpartum recovery you risk suffering in silence and isolation. You might even worry yourself with thoughts that cause anxiety, depression, self-hate, jealousy, and fear. Too many women suffer in silence because I believe we’ve done a horrible job talking about our own postpartum struggles and celebrations in complete transparency. Isn’t it time we change that? I am determined to make it more known starting with myself.
While I don’t have a magical solution to your personal postpartum struggles, I do have one suggestion:
Why? Because the most reassuring words that have helped me in my postpartum journey have been “Yeah, that’s normal. Me too.” Relief & healing happen much quicker when you realize you’re not the only one going through this and that these changes are not permanent. Most of the time all you need is just someone to listen & validate your words during your postpartum recovery. They say it takes a village to raise a child. While that’s true, I say it starts with just a small amount of courage to share your struggles & celebrations with one trusted mom friend who can be there for you.
A 6 Weeks Postpartum Survivor
This post is meant to inform & express my personal opinion about this product. My purpose is to share my personal experience and also educate what I now know. I hope I don’t downplay,offend,or disrespect anyone affiliated with BeachBody. In fact, I believe that with the right precautions & expectations it’s actually a good way to get started on your fitness journey.
There was a summer years ago when my hubby and I thought it was a good idea to buy the Insanity DVD’s from Craigslist to get in shape. Every time we did the workouts, we were told we needed to buy Shakeology. Since we wanted the muscles Sean T promised we ended up doing so. In hindsight, it’s silly to think we’d get results from just drinking a shake and doing 2 months of HIIT cardio. What can I say, we were young and naive. We didn’t know any better. After finishing the program, we stopped taking the supplement mainly because it’s expensive as hell. Obviously, our bodies gradually took back their pre-isanity shape within weeks. We knew what we had to do to get back into shape, but just thinking about doing another round of Insanity was exhausting. So the DVD’s sat there collecting dust for years.
I’ve seen the before and afters of people claiming it’s worked for them. I mean, it did for us to a degree but the results weren’t sustainable. They just didn’t last very long which was always so discouraging. It wasn’t until I learned about counting macros in January of 2015 that I realized why it works.
Now that I count macros I choose to eat more protein in the form of food. Sometimes I supplement with a protein powder of my choice if I haven’t eaten enough for the day. I don’t drink a protein shake & hope to get fit. I know exactly how much I need per day according to my current goals. Right now, I’m drinking Whey+ Dutch Chocolate from Legion Athletics. I don’t get paid to share this. I simply do my own research & try different ones out. So if you’re looking to get in shape, you don’t need Shakeology but you can choose that form of protein if you want. My suggestion is to figure out how much protein your body needs (along with fats & carbs) for your specific fitness goals.
I hope that you enjoyed this article & that I didn’t step on any toes.
We all have our share of bad days. Yesterday I had mine and today was supposed to be different. Today I woke up early, rested, & ready to conquer the world. Today I assumed, everything was supposed to go right.
After getting my makeup on at 5:15 in the morning I started breakfast like I’ve done a million times before. There was no reason to expect a problem. But there it was anyway. I had attempted to peel 3 eggs that looked as though a group of rats had gnawed them open instead. I tried to hold it back. I tried to tell myself I’d eventually get it right but they sat there mocking me, shoving the word failure down my throat.
My husband was finally up so I called him over for help. As he sat there patiently watching me peel my 4th egg, I broke down. Somehow I made the egg explode into a million pieces all over the kitchen sink out of sheer frustration. I was about to start crying but instead started laughing at the expression of shock on his face.
I’m embarrassed to tell you I cried. Yeah, I could blame my hormones. I could blame the pregnancy. But I knew that wasn’t the case. So I let it out. I told my husband that I didn’t want to have another bad day and that starting my day failing at peeling eggs wasn’t helping.
He said ” Yeah, this does suck. But just because you’re having a bad moment doesn’t man you’re a failure.” Then he suggested I update my Snapchat about my breakdown. I laughed at the idea of it and said ” What the hell is wrong with you? People are going to laugh because its not a real problem “. Obviously, this put the situation in perspective but I realized that even though it’s not a serious problem, it was still very frustrating. I was minimizing it. This problem almost made me want to give up on hard boiled eggs for the rest of my life.
But what if I had just started my health journey?
I could’ve said, “Screw this. Let’s go get donuts instead” had that been my go-to emotional comfort zone. I could’ve said ” This is what happens when I try to eat healthy! Clearly, I suck. I’m never going to try again.” Honestly, these thoughts are still there. I just don’t follow through.
As a mom, I find that our own expectations of perfection can be our worst enemies towards self-defeat. So I’m going to end with this…
The next time I’m able to peel a hard boiled egg I will definitely admire the beauty of it’s perfection, celebrate the victory, & remember the lessons it’s taught me today.
“She’s making us look bad” the mom said (speaking for herself and her friend) to her 3 year old girl when she and her little friend asked what I was doing. On the same swing set I had put Emma in and started doing some split squats with a 10 lb dumb bell in each hand. Had I done this before? No, it was actually my first time trying something new.
I usually do weights in the privacy of my home but today was such a beautiful day I decided to throw them in the stroller and get my butt/leg workout outside. Any mom, including myself, knows what our mom culture is like based on social media comments. It’s not new to me that other mom’s like to judge each other & say mean things. It’s was just shocking to hear her say it out loud to her kid.
I stayed quiet and calm and continued to do my thing. However, if I had the opportunity to talk to her right now, I’d say:
“Dear Judgmental Mama,
I didn’t plan on going out of my way to show off in front of you or your daughter. I wasn’t secretly plotting up ways to embarrass you in front of your kid. I’m sorry if you experienced emotions you didn’t know how to process. I was just doing my thing. I was out there enjoying my day with my daughter and getting my exercise in. Normally, I try to avoid being a target of your judgement by staying at home but today was different. I wanted to be out in the sunshine too.
I sincerely hope that one day you can learn to embrace and respect that other moms are different than you but that it doesn’t make you less of an awesome mom. I also pray that you can learn to love who you are already instead of believing to have to fit a certain mold to be viewed as a “good” mom. Because the reality is that we desperately need to change the dividing judgmental mom culture we live in if we want our daughters to grow up feeling confident and empowered. This starts with us even if you don’t think so. Your daughter is listening and learning at the playground and at home. And like me, she might one day feel the need to hide in a corner because she’s afraid of other people’s judgment based on the way you judge others. So please, think about what you say before you say it. Not for my sake, because the truth is your sting didn’t hurt, stop, or embarrass me. But for the sake of your daughter and my daughter’s generation.”
Much love, DeeDee
My Workout today: I walked/jogged ONE mile pushing the stroller up a steady UPHILL with several breaks in between to catch my breath. Then a I walked ONE mile downhill to the park. Emma, plus the stroller, and the dumbbells equals about 70 lbs. Then when I got to the park I did:
This is my daughter and I at 22 weeks pregnant with baby #2. It wasn’t easy, especially given the situation but it was fun being outside in the sunny cool California weather with my 2 year old girl. Go out there and get it too <3
Initially, I wrote this for myself. But then I thought, hmmm…why not share these intimate details with soon to be first time moms or even those considering to get pregnant again. Maybe just maybe, someone will read something here and learn from my mistakes. Or at least be encouraged to know that the next pregnancy can be better.
EMMA (Pregnancy #1)
BABY BOY (Pregnancy #2)
In my opinion, the best kind of recipes require minimal prep time & don’t need to be checked until it’s done. I usually mix these lentils with diced fresh tomatoes, cucumbers, feta and brushetta sauce. The combinations are endless though which is why I make basic recipe often.
Step 1: Rinse your lentils in a sieve. Pick out anything that doesn’t look like a lentil & throw it away.
Step 2: Put all the ingredients and washed lentils inside the rice cooker. (I bought this Aroma Professional at Costco for $40 bucks!)
Step 3: Press the “Slow Cook” button. After 1.5-2 hours, the machine will beep when it’s done. Take them out within 15 minutes & transfer to a tightly sealed container in the fridge. Or add a bit more more water and press “Keep Warm” if you’re serving them as is.
Servings: 1 • Size: 50 grams dry (about 1/4 cup ) = 130 grams cooked
Calories: 170 • Protein: 12 g • Carb: 30 g • Fat: 0 g
* I’ve only had success making lentils in the rice cooker. I have no idea how long it takes on the stovetop or if the consistency is as amazing as using this machine. But I will do my best to test and update that process soon.